Hvorfor Ikke?

Bike like a Bullitt on this!
In attempts to drive my readership down to nul, I am going to make a plea/request here. You will be witnessing my request to Larry Vs. Harry, the makers of this sexy machine. I try to make these post G or PG because I don't want you to have to cover your screen just like when you read that blog with the Bike Snob. Once I had the horror of opening a post with my kid and witnessing one of his favorite graphics. I won't tell you which one it is. So, that is fair warning, don't click on it if you don't want your eyes to burn. Dayenu!

When this bike came out I drooled all over my screen. By this time we were no longer living in wonderful Copenhagen. I love this bike because it combines functionality with what I want: a light bike. I don't know what to tell you. I have zero money to buy this beast. I know exactly what it costs and I would need the accessories to put my kid in it. One can go out to Portland to get it, but I don't want to do that and I can't. That is the main reason I ended up buying my current bike at the Dutch Bike Company. I want a piece of Denmark again. I know, I live with Mr. Peyos who is Danish, but other than that I don't have much in my life other than the occasional visit from those tall Vikings who show up at our door once in a while.

Look, I live in Seattle. We used to live in København and sometimes we would do the strenuous bike up Valby Bakke. You know, I felt like I was in Danmark Rundt. I really did. Now I live in Seattle, where streets are idiotic and steep. Det er ikke sjovt.

Your videos are awesome  I love the ones where you put together a bike wearing an Elvis Costume. I mean, that is the best. Here, I will make my viewership watch it.

So, now to the groveling:

I want to make some kind of exchange. Look, your website needs some localization help. Now, I am not going to criticize the layout because look at my lazy blog. I can't even get around to sticking my Twitter here. I live with an seasoned localization expert and a Dane to boot. He can help you fix your localization problems because you do have some. I want you to sell more bikes and fixing your website would be nice right?

What are his qualifications? First, he went to Metropolitanskolen. Does that help? Kender I ham? He has an M.A. in linguistics from a renowned Linguistics department (No, it's not UDub, which translates as University of Washington). He worked on the Danish spellchecker for Word. Ahh, but you say it's lort, but it would have been so much more if he was allowed to truly fix it. When I say he is good, I mean it. He wouldn't be working where he does now if he wasn't.

I just want a trade. You send me a blå cykel (just like the Ibens song, "Jeg savner min blå, blå cykel" and I offer my expert super-duper mand to help you.

I would even bike around with ads for the bike EVERYWHERE. We don't own a car so this is how we get around Seattle. As crazy as it seems, my kids school is 16 kilometers by bike each way. Det er skørt!

Let's compare your bakke to our Seattle bakker.

Seattle Bakke

Copenhagen Bakke

Heck I would even bike around with ads for Sussi og Leo. D-A-D? Sorte Sol?  Okay, you twist my arm, classic Sussi and Leo. I remember watching a show on TV2 about them and their extracurricular hobbies. Did you see it too? Frankly, I am scared of Sussi, but please don't tell her that.

I don't ask for much, but while you are at it, send me kager fra La Glace. Yes, it's kosher.

In order to make it more interesting let's get a beer company involved! I know, you love your danske øl but it is so hard to get it here so I have to settle on other stuff to drink. We like the beer from the New Belgium Brewing. I know, I tried to get free stuff all the time and I will prove that I even attempted to get some free beer out of them too.

Okay, I relent. New Belguim Brewing, I promise not to send you jarred gefilte fish if you help me get my bike.

Larry vs. Harry, contact me! Let's make a trade. I can't put this on a credit card like all Americans, it's just not right. I like going to the store and saying på beløbet. If you can't send me the blå one, then I will settle for anything but hvid because that color is ugly.

I even have the perfect slogan I would put on the back: Skide godt! 

 Here is my Twitter: Contact me! 


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